Get your Ex back;- Is your relationship on the verge of bursting, but it is not over yet?
Then look here to see how you can still save your relationship.
Imagine him dumping you the day before Valentine’s Day.
It had come like a bolt of thunder – and not just one during a powerful thunderstorm. You didn’t understand. How could your ex-boyfriend do this?
You loved him very much and would do anything to get him back.
I firmly believe that if you do the right things, you have a chance to restore your relationship.
Will it work no matter what?
No. If a woman has cheated on five of his best friends in one night, the chances are slim.
Of course, it is not easy.
But in home-garden-and-kitchen situations where partners in a relationship want two different things, and one of them decides to call it quits, there is hope.
That doesn’t mean it’s easy.
But if you want something easy, just grab your phone to play CandyCrush. That’s easy, it’s fun. But you will not get your ex back with it.
No. If you want something in life, you will have to work for it.
How am I going to help you with this?
A woman is sad because she broke up with her boyfriend.
And I may be joking about it, but of course, I understand that it is a very bad situation that you are in.
Being abandoned by someone you love is one of the most traumatic experiences that can happen to you as a woman.
Scientific research has shown that while women experience more emotional pain from a break-up, they do recover more fully than men.
Women eventually come out stronger. Men never make a full recovery – they just get on with their lives.
He is being ripped out of your life and that hurts a lot. You feel helpless and don’t know how to solve it. Because of your desperation, you can try anything to get it back.
One more desperate than the other.
Don’t do things you’ll regret later like:
- Overwhelm him with texts or phone calls
- Visit him unannounced
- Approach him (via various) social media accounts
- Or take a spray can to a viaduct to paint a very large “ I love His Name” …
You need to know something:
Some actions increase your chances of getting it back. And some actions reduce your chance.
I am going to make your ex miss you again, and make him realize how great you are.
so HE wants to get you back.
Below I give you my exact step-by-step plan to get your ex back. Failure to adhere to the roadmap could ruin your chance of ever getting it back.
1. Get your Ex back for all the right reasons
A woman wonders if her ex-boyfriend is making her happy, or if she wants to win him back so she isn’t single anymore. A break-up is one of the worst things you can experience.
I broke a leg and had several holes in my head. But when I think back to the pain of a broken heart …
Then it is a lot more annoying.
With a broken leg, you go in a cast for six weeks, and that’s about it. But a broken heart takes a little longer.
The pain you feel is real.
Understand that you are in pain and be aware of it.
I am telling you to hit your leg with a hammer to distract you from the pain of your heartbreak?
No, of course not.
What I do think is that you have to take into account that you are in pain.
Even though it’s not the most sensible move at the moment, your heart needs it.
Before you put on your best lingerie set and throw yourself at the feet of your ex crying, you want to ask yourself one important question:
Do I want it back just to ease the pain?
When someone breaks up with us, something funny happens. If you love someone, that person’s judgment is important to you.
And then when that person decides to end the relationship, your brain thinks:
“Oh, this wonderful person doesn’t want to see me again. I must be a bad person. ”
In science, this is called cognitive dissonance.
It causes tremendous pain. Someone you love, someone you trust, decides to stamp your heart by denying you access to their love. It slaps your self-esteem.
The impulse to reclaim him as quickly as possible can, therefore, become very great. After all, you love him, and you don’t want someone you love to look bad on you.
the wrong manYou can love someone who doesn’t make you happy
However, there is 1 problem:
You can love someone who doesn’t make you happy at all.
Being a bad person in his eyes (even though he’s a jerk himself) has become unbearable for her.
Does he make you happy?
But if you look:
Whether he makes you happy …
Whether he treats you with respect …
Or you will get what you need from him …
Do you still want that?
The answer is ” No “, then I would advise you to swallow quite a deep breath and here clicking. Then I will forward you to an article about how to deal with heartbreak and how to deal with it.
It may seem like no one else will love you
And I want you to remember that it might seem like no one else is going to love you. And that you’d rather be with someone you love than risk being alone forever.
But I want to reassure you:
Relationships break out every day, and all those people find someone new.
I think it is much better to find someone who will make you happy. Life is too short to spend with someone who makes you unhappy.
pink glasses view your relationship from a new perspective
If you have any doubts about which category your husband falls into, you can always consult with family and friends.
I’m not a fan of asking your loved ones for advice when it comes to relationships. Everyone talks from their own, colored experiences. But in this case, it is a bit different. You don’t ask for advice, but you ask them a specific question:
“In your eyes, have I become happier since dating [Name of your ex]?”
They can give you a different perspective, which is not colored by those pink glasses. If the two of you together conclude that it didn’t make you happier, they can help you come out better. That is also one of my tips for dealing with heartbreak.
Do you still want him back?
Now I’ve given you this warning.
My question is simple:
Did your friend make you happy? And do you love him? And is that why you still want it back?
Then it is time to think a lot. So get in the right position, put on your seat belt, and brace yourself …
Because here’s my second tip for reclaiming your ex:
2. Define the problems
It is quite a shock. You will have trouble thinking clearly, or you may not even believe it. The feelings you have are so intense. And the situation is a lot more difficult.
Draw rational conclusions – put the emotion aside for a moment.
I understand that very well. It’s a difficult situation. But I’m not writing this article to pat you on the back and say:
“Come, come, it will be fine.”
I am here to give you advice which increases the chance that you will get your ex-boyfriend back.
And for that, it is important to do something difficult.
Look very rationally at why your ex broke up !!
Rational and pay attention:
I consciously write ‘rationally’. If you start looking at it emotionally, it will only make you unhappy.
You can conclude that you are not good enough, or that he does not love you enough. But life isn’t that black and white.
What reason was there to break up?
If you think carefully about what triggered it, the specific reason, that he broke up with you …
What do you end up with?
For example, was it because you are at work, and you could not spend much time with him? Because you cheated? Because he no longer finds you attractive?
Thing about it !! You want to be as specific as possible about why your boyfriend broke up with you.
He must have concluded somewhere that he is not happy.
You want to find out what caused this.
I know this is a tough question to answer. Thinking about it can cause a flood of emotions.
Then remember that you are drawing it back on yourself. Calm down. And think back to exactly what he said when he broke up with you.
Do you dare?
3. Solve the problem
A woman comes up with the solution to a relationship problem. It sounds very logical, and sorry if you’ve already thought of this yourself.
But before you do anything to get your ex back, you want to be 100% sure you’re not going to run into the same problem.
For example, if he complained that you were at work too much and didn’t pay attention to him, Make sure you take time off at work (or from other things), so that you can be with him when the time comes.
There can be several causes of your breakup.
- The passion is gone from the relationship.
- Your life has collapsed.
- You didn’t do fun things together anymore.
- He wanted children, but you didn’t? Or vice versa?
- You had relationship problems because of cheating.
You can fix some of these. Others (such as disagreements about a desire to have children) are much more difficult to resolve without compromise.
Now let’s take as an example that you spend too much time on your work.
Ask yourself what is more important to you.
Then take the initiative to solve the problem yourself.
There is a big difference between a woman who is dependent, and then hopes that a man will take her back and, on the other hand, a woman who takes the initiative and solves the problem on the other hand.
4. Stay positive
No one likes someone sad all day long. We all prefer to hang out with people who feel good about themselves.
So if you feel bad, you become less pleasant to the people around you. That is not very useful if you want to conquer your ex back.
But there is something else:
The more you focus on your bad feelings, the more prominent the place they occupy in your life becomes.
So if you spend a lot of time thinking about how bad it is, “your ex is gone” will be constantly on your mind.
The more it is on your mind, the more you get used to it. And the more you get used to thinking about your grief, the more you feel bored.
So if we add up that no one likes to be around someone who is constantly sad, and that every bit of attention you give to sadness makes you sad more often and longer.
Now you understand why you should not give too much attention to your grief.
You have to learn to get your ex back, and also to let him go.
Lock yourself in your room. Let those emotions out.
This is not to make you worse, but to let the tension that is in your body come out.
But once your biggest tears have dried, and you start thinking more and more about how bad it all is, it’s time to correct yourself.
If you are only concerned with your grief, you lower your chances of him coming back to you.
Your emotions are powerful. Your grief is like a volcano where lava builds up beneath the Earth’s surface. If the pressure gets too high, the volcano will erupt.
What you want is to put the energy that builds up beneath the surface into something else.
Something that increases the chance that your friends will come back to you.
5. Make him feel that his actions have consequences
He’s making it pretty difficult for you. He breaks up with you while you are not waiting for this. He breaks your heart.
That must hurt. Then I think you can do the same.
To make you feel better, you can try 9 steps to regulate your emotions.
Not in desperate or malicious ways like … Call his parents.
Post humiliating stories about him on Facebook / Instagram.
What you want to do; make it clear to him what the consequences of his actions are.
“He doesn’t want to be a set with you anymore.”
Ok, got it.
This also means that you are no longer a friend.
- No longer living together
- No visit
The moment you continue to act as if you are in a relationship, or continuously show that you want him back, his actions have no consequences on him.
“He put you in the fridge”
He didn’t lose anything by breaking up with you. He’s put you in the fridge and can take you out when he’s hungry again.
He doesn’t have to make a choice.
Every man has an instinct to go after a beautiful woman.
But if he already has her?
Then the instinct stays off. However, if you show that you are no longer his, his hunting instinct can go ‘ON’ again.
Act like he hasn’t got you yet.
- Stay independent
- No contact
- Don’t do things that couples do
- Do fun things with friends etc.
6. Don’t make friends with your ex
If you notice that your ex doesn’t miss you, has no interest in getting back together, Don’t seduce him.
After a few months, if it doesn’t get better, then don’t fall into the trap of becoming “ friends ” with him.
I already explained once why staying friends with your ex is not a good idea (and how you should do it anyway if you are stubborn and ignore my advice).
I recommend you TO move on.
When you are in heartbreak, you get worse and worse this way.
I don’t wish you that. Keep in mind that there are more fish swimming in the sea.
Are you not sure whether you really should leave him behind?
Do you think the time has come to let him go for good?
Delete his number and never contact him again !!
It prevents you from spending too much time with him. He’s supposed to miss you, not call you when he wants someone to watch football with.
So. That was my step-by-step plan to get your ex back.
Make sure you read this article too… 7 Handy tips to handle a relationship with a Narcissist.